Should i allow a big male dog to show my male puppy who's boss?

I keep being told by my family to allow their large male german sheppard to growl, Bark, Show his teeth and lunge at my 12 week old male puppy, I have tried on several occasions but find it quite upsetting and end up picking him up, I think the big dogs behaves too aggressive. I understand the pecking order thing but one snap would take my puppy's head off!! Sometimes their other male dog gets involved also and the pair of them growl and open their mouth onto my puppy's back and back of he's neck leaving him covered in slime, scared and yelping. I'm worried i'm going to fall out with my family members as I just cannot carry on allowing this. What generally is acceptable to allow the pecking order as I would like us to all go out for walks etc and what is cled as out of order by the big dog. They make me feel like i'm an idiot but its very hard to watch. Please help!